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Warning this will be a long and somewhat rambling essay style post but it will cover the broad sweep of things

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I Object,

Slowly the country around us slips towards facist oppression, no it does really, the average person on the street is letting this country slide by not resisting the limits on our freedoms that are being placed one brick at a time

i do not drive, i do not leave the country therefore i do not have a passport or driving licence, but increasingly everywhere we turn these two documents are becoming mandatory to do anything and i object, i will not pay for the privelidge of a document i do not need just to do other things,

my government dosnt yet require me to own an id card or passport in order to simply be in this country but its coming, unless we change things it is coming, but more and more companies are seeming to think that we must possess these,

i cannot change my bank, Barclays who i have been with for years have given me problems and irritated me over the years, but i am not allowed to open an account anywhere else because i cannot show a document with my picture on it to prove i am who everything else says i am, documents from the government, my current bank, my former employer are not good enough,

at the scala (a club in kings cross) technically without id you cannot purchase alcohol, even if you clearly are not underage its the rules,
and now at the electric ballroom starting next week you can only enter by showing id and they scan it for some unspecified purpose, and i feel a cold chill running down my back at the controls and limitations being imposed on our society that are not even the government doing it, its companies and institutions doing it to us,

Equal opportunties continues to be waved as a flag when in fact what they speak of is racist discrimination against the majority, how many jobs have i not been considered for because they 'need' non white people to be 'equal ops' this is the insanity of the world we are living in, i do not, will not fill in 'equal ops monitoring forms' as they have no need to know, no need to ask,

our country has become a society obsessed by laws and justice is gone from our lands, when did it happen when did rules and regulations become more important than justice, about that which is wrong being righted, this government voted for by a minority of the population rules a society decending into tyranny but not in my name, i refuse to bow to the tyrannies of restrictions i will not sit back,

perhaps this country needs people to vote for the fascists the racists and the communists perhaps we need a government made up of the very worst our society has to offer in order to show the people the hell that is being built brick by brick as our current 'leaders' slide towards that slowly, like the frog being slowly boiled alive in the pot not seeing the danger until its too late, at least if the BNP or some other truly monstrous group became our government for even four years (more likely less) perhaps people would take note and see where we are going

once a leader threw his weight around and those he ruled were dissatisfied, they rebelled against him and forced him to sign magna carta an agreement of the limitations and rules by which things might continue,
before that there was a society where a representative of the people sat in the government, and if any policy or course of action was deemed to be against the interests of the people he could stop it instantly by simply standing and saying veto,

well i object, now when does this stop

[RP] Heroic final stands

so after having partaken of another heroic last stand last night, a thought occurs

is there a way to have a stat blocked villain that will not utterly trounce the heroe/s making said stand pointless but at the same time not give a chance to utterly crush the villain

now ill keep the result vs the wyrm incarnate secret for now, just cause well, yes others should get to reveal that one,

take a famous example from my own normal group (setting Earthdawn)
a band of 4 heroes are fleeing a Kaer (underground city complex in a fantasy magic world) after having encountered a metric ton of mid level undead with a few nasty cthuloidian beings with them,
due to ego two of the party both decide to heroic last stand to buy escape time for the other two (well what can i say seriously neither of us was willing to run and leave the other,

result, heroes slaughter everything and win the day, despite at the face of it that being unwinnable and yet not that out of the ordinary rolling, but as each 'thing' had a statblock a combination of them not being able to actually hit for shit against a pair of reasonable melee characters standing back to back depite the fact they should have crushed us in a few rounds and us hitting the horde of undead to scythe through them,

(okay of the two who ran one died when he forgot about a trap we had bypassed coming in and walked straight into it but hey ho)

there have been other occasions (usually DnD or Earthdawn) where a heroic last stand and its been clear and obvious that it was has turned into a victory for team hero, and as far as can be seen its when the GM puts a stat block to the other side to let you fight it out rather than saying you die in X time,

so Heroic last stands, do they need to be Cinematic descriptions or can you actually have a fight where the end result is in no doubt merely when and how good you look doing it,

Technically im a bit erm

So its been quite a day
Technically im now redundant, but ive also applied for my own job (well its my job plus some new bits, its slightly better paid)
and its been the last day of term, that said my 'situation' wasnt mentioned at all in public and by the tone of the letter putting in writing what id been told last week it sounds like they are expecting me to be the one that gets the new job,

but its all a bit confused and a bit strange as there are other situations going on as well

then also today i cleared out the miniscule ammount of stuff that was ostensibly mine, as well as finishing off the packing up of the labs, kinda scary and sad to see the rooms ive worked in for four years reduced to a pile of boxes before they gut them out and turn them into the new ict rooms and turn upstairs (the old ict rooms) into the new science labs over summer,

still ive had some wine, some beer, and had some time in the school garden with the rest of the staff and i have an interview in another school next week and will probably get an interview for my current job at the start of august

and now much as i like james and would like to celebrate with him, trance is not my thing, right now im going to eat, get properly attired, head to camden and enjoy metal music until after 3 in the morning because i need it cause right now im not sure if i sober up and consider where i currently am that i wont just break down and cry,

if anyone really wants to contact me youll find me tonight in the hobgoblin in camden, followed by the electric ballroom

bleh food's ready

Bah well lets try writing it all down

well not normally one for this kind of thing to this level but here it goes,

so last night was a friday night for me this means out to club (careful budgeting to manage it but then i dont drink that much really) and its also the start of half term so no work next week, so as per normal we start in camden at the hobgoblin for a little relaxed drinking with a backdrop of metal music before heading over to the Scala for UNHOLY, catching a live performance by the Sohodolls was quite nice, savagemessiah isnt bad either but then at the techno/metal/rock end of the spectrum im pretty generous in praise,  and one day ill find more than the odd one or two people who know what im talking about when i say names like Aura Hiemis and Lethian Dreams but thats a sidetrack

but of course after a while it didnt seem so fun anymore, as that feeling that has a habit of creeping up on me was infact creeping up on me, cause its the old complaint really, i am single and alone and that just gets me deep down constantly because i came to realise that ultimatly im a social animal alone is not fun and i cant bear it long unless im really heavily distracted, its not true for everyone but for me its a fact, and besides whats the point in life if you dont have anyone to share it with, but then i get angry mostly with myself because im so useless and fail i wouldnt know what and how to fix this because i am horribly insecure and do not know how to go about fixing this and so i go on walking through the world alone in hte middle of crowds randomly approaching breakdown into streaming tears when i either i get to consider my life as distraction fails or when i start to get more sober after drinking (making a very important reason why i dont drink much as among other things when i stop i start getting sober and then collapse into a sobbing wreck), throwing myself into larp and otehr hobbies to not look at the emptyness of my life, my job is now a low paid joke taking up half my time which then leaves me with more free time on my hand so i end up dreading holidays and slowly it rolls on a cycle of pain and anger and how long can this really go on before it consumes me?

What's Your Celtic Animal?

Your Animal is the Seal
You are a compassionate, sensitive soul. You feel deeply.
You are also a dreamer and a romantic. You have a glorious imagination.

You are flexible and adaptable. You can make do in any situation.
You are very loving and affectionate. You are generous toward those who are important to you.
so basically doing the math (something im quite good at) the following is my prediction for the end of the week

25% chance the admin half of my job becomes consumed/altered/enhanced by some new super project plan or objective giving me more to do on that side

25% chance that im going to end up being made to do something to keep me busy that will be poor compensation or just crap

50% chance im going to end up on a parttime contract as a science technician only which will reduce my pay by about 1/3 at which point the only thing that will be keeping me here is not having as much time as the unemployed to look for a different job, and not having found something to go for based on not knowing what i want to do and not seeing anything i know is up my street which i will have an advantage in applying for

and all this comes based off a few facts -
1 thanks to me being super efficiant and making suggestions that stopped the admin side of things driving me off the deep end (and some of it was i mean just crazy) things got faster and faster to do so that admin work is easier and efficiant
2 the two previous people i mainly worked for in admin changed last year, this year the new people have settled in and frankly arnt disorganised admin disasters so they need less support
3 the Admin and finance manager and the hr manager want to talk tomorrow about my admin role
4 this is a time when people are trying to economise

this is not a place of employment where you get asked to have a chat and things are just ticking last time i got a major project that took weeks was really interesting and made things a bit more interesting, that said no hr manager that time (well actually there wasnt one full stop but)

i can see it coming, the insight and intuition have pieced together the threads and come to the result, and damn it part of me is down knowing the end of this job is coming and at a dangerous time for such things, the other side of me feels nothing but rage that it came to this in the first place and the nature of my job has always been an oddity in the system

ahh well the die is cast already time to see if i called the fall then

The Great Failure of Maelstrom

like jason scott's great failure of wikipedia speech im going for an attention grabbing title, deal with it
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be warned, Still Alive by Lisa Miskovsky its a nice tune but it wont half get stuck in the head

Getting started

and thus the people spoke unto whitenoise and said, get thee onto live journal as thats where things are organised, and then came Whitenoise unto the LJ and there was much fear and sorrow for the hope of man,

Well so far so good, Live journal account - check, getting into Zeitgeist related hijinx - check ish,
next stop conquer the world and become head of a benevolent dictatorship